How to Feel Valued in My Marriage as a Black Wife

Value is not just what someone says to you; Value is how they treat your time.

MARRIAGE & FAITHGODLY WISDOM & ENCOURAGEMENT

4/9/20262 min read

How to Feel Valued in My Marriage

Scripture: Proverbs 31:29

Value is not just what someone says to you. Value is how they treat your time.

How they respond when you are overwhelmed. Whether they notice when you are gone and miss you when you are not there. Whether they ask about your dreams the way they expect you to ask about theirs.

If you have been searching for how to feel valued in your marriage as a black woman, you already know the difference between being loved and being valued. Because you have been loved. You are just not sure you have been valued.

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Because black women bring an enormous amount to their marriages. They bring strength, strategy, faith, creativity, emotional intelligence, and cultural endurance that is unlike anything else. And far too often, that contribution is treated as expected rather than exceptional.

Proverbs 31:29 says "many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all." That is not something said to a woman who is invisible. That is something said to a woman whose value has been seen, recognized, and spoken.

You deserve that spoken recognition in your home.

This is one of the most layered conversations in the black marriage space right now.

Here is the practical side of this:

Feeling valued often requires you to name what value looks like to you specifically. Not what it looks like in a movie or a marriage book. What it looks like for you, in your home, in your real life.

Does value feel like your husband taking something off your list without being asked?
Does it feel like him bragging about you to other people?
Does it feel like him protecting your rest?
Does it feel like financial decisions being made together?

Get specific. Then have the conversation. Because your husband cannot value what he does not know you need.

The Uncommon Wife is a community for black wives who are done settling for love without value. Come find out what it looks like to be fully honored in your marriage at theuncommonwife.com.

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